Two Lesbians Raised a Baby and This is what They Got

So the following video was found on facebook:
http://front.moveon.org/two-lesbians-raised-a-baby-and-this-is-what-they-got/
Alright, so I watched this video because it was posted by a number of my facebook friends and was a little disenheartened by it. I began thinking seriously why I was so bothered by this video and then it hit me. This is a very well educated, well spoken young man who was raised by two lesbians which means that, obviously, same sex couples are just as capable of raising children, right? Maybe, but that's not what bothers me. Through this young man's talk, there is an overtone that I ignored completely through my first viewing. In his case, men are apparently unnecessary. Think about it, his whole point is that he is successful, and well adjusted, and all with two mom's, so a woman can do just as a well as a man being a father.

Here are some problems with this:
1. It takes away the God given uniqueness that we have as male and female. We are different. There is no way to get around it. That doesn't make one bother than the other, just different. Think of it like this, 2+2 = 4. So does 3 + 1. These are different statements but the same equality. Yet according to this young man, it doesn't matter. Two dads, two moms, a mom and a dad. It's all the same. Yet we're told something very different in the Bible: "God created man [humanity] in his image; in the diving image He created them; male and female he created them." Gen. 1:27 (bold and brackets added).
We have a uniqueness, an no woman can fulfill certain roles that are meant for man, such as being a father, and no man can fulfill certain roles meant for woman, such as being a mother. Aside from the faith, biologically, this is an impossiblity. But here's the kicker...

2. I think that both the young man and the mothers, as least subconsciously, know that a male presence in necessary in the growth and development of a child. What evidence to I have of that? Straight from this young man's mouth. He boasts, proudly, of being an Eagle Scout. Now, I know a few peole who are Eagle Scouts, and they are proud of it. As one who left the Boy Scouts before getting know, I know why. It is an accomplishment that is difficult to achieve and requires a lot discipline and dedication to service of your community and to God. Anyone who achieves should speak proudly of their achievemnt. But my question is this, why was he even in Boy Scouts? I believe that, even if it was at a subconscious level, both this young man and his mothers knew he would need good male role models to help teach and guide him in what it means to be a man. No woman could ever be this guide through manhood adequately because she doesn't know what it means to be man. And how fortunate it was that this young man was able to become so involved in an organization that was able to guide him this way!

3. This is a well adjusted and successful young man. But what about his father? What about his sister? "Thankfully" both this young man and his sister were conceived in their mother through IVF (invitro ferlization) by the same anonymous donor. Yet all that is know of the father is he is an anonymous donor. Holy crap, I hear constantly how men need to step up and be men by we applaud this unknown person just giving up some sperm and shirking off any and all responisbility for his actions. How is that manly? How is that teaching our children to take responsibility for their actions? And does this young man's sister have a man in her life to teach her what love is in an unconditional and nonsexual way. Does she know of her intrinsic dignity and beauty without having to sexualize herself?

I am not saying that these two lesbian woman are horrible parents and have forever scarred their children. Not at all. What I am saying is that this video only proves that we have a young, well adjusted, successful man who happens to have two mothers. I think it opens up a few things that do need to be discussed. I think there are deeper issues here than whether or not two women can raise kids. I think we really need to look at specific gender roles (and yes, it's okay to have gender roles), and a man's role and responisbility in the development of his children.

But these are just my thoughts. What are yours?

Perfectly Lonely

It has been quite some time since I sat and wrote, but here we go again!

There is a song by John Mayer called "Perfectly Lonely." Essentially, it is about how his life is fantastic because he doesn't have a significant other and can do whatever the heck he wants.

I am not like John Mayer in this sense. I am, however, I think perfectly lonely. About 10 months ago I left everything I knew in Sandusky and moved up to Perrysburg for my new job in Maumee. As a youth minister, I plugged into my parish and have slowly been getting to know new people and families here. However, the one thing I discovered is that, even though I'm 20 minutes north or south of a college campus, the number of young adults my age is minimal. As a side note, I feel very weird calling myself a young adult, I still feel like a kid sometimes.

Anyways, I sometimes get caught up in this loneliness of not really having any close, personal friends to hang out with occassionally. Now mind you, I work most evenings and am trying to spend my time with my beautiful girlfriend on the weekends, but that still leaves me almost always being at work or at my apartment by myself. It's to the point where I value the time I spend with my teens and my Core team because at least I have other people around.

But as I often pray for God to help me find friends or help me from my lonliness, He helps me realize something: I am not alone. He is with me. Constantly there by my side providing my with all the love I could ever want. Now I often think, as I'm sure many do, that I cannot feel, see, hear or speak to God as I could another human being. And that's very true. But that doesn't neglect the fact that He is there with me. And when I actually take the time to shut off the computer, turn off the tv, put down the video games, close the fiction book I'm reading and mabye pick up a Bible, or the rosary, or a good spiritual read, or just sit in silence He speaks volumes.

I think it's the human condition for us to want other people around. We were not made to be alone! We were made to live in community of some sort. And I long for that and miss the time I had with my good friends in college. But I also believe that God is using this time in my life to teach me that no matter where I go, He is there. And no matter what, He is there to love me. To forgive me. To encourage me to go further.

So I am perfectly lonely. Because I belong to my Father. And even if I have no one else to talk to, He is always there with a listening ear. And I know that out of His love for me, if I'm patient He'll eventually give me some time where another person will be there with me, too.

Being Pro-Life

I am pro-life.

I think sometimes we forget about what that means. It doesn't just mean that I'm against abortion. It means that I am for the very cause of life, in every way possible. Whether it be for a baby who has yet to be born, or a terrorist who has caused untold pain and suffering to countless people.

I find myself disgusted by some of my fellow countrymen and women this week. This past Sunday, President Obama went live and informed America that the "enemy" that we have been so untiredly seeking, Osama bin Laden, had been killed, and the "justice" was finally served. And America responded with celebration and jubilee.

Now I'm not defending bin Laden. I'm not saying that the way he lived his life was right. It wasn't. Devoting your life to the killing of innocent people because they are different from you is wrong. And I'm not saying the men who took his life were wrong. I understand that he was killed because of a fire fight, and had the men who were trying to capture actually decided that capturing him alive was what was going to happen, those men's lives may very well have been lost and bin Laden would have escaped to wreak more havoc on the world. But what I am saying is that we should not be so joyful that a man was gunned down.

When I say I'm against abortion, I don't mean I'm against killing a baby in the womb because it has potential to do great things and deserves a chance to live, even though it does. I say I'm against abortion because that baby has a soul that was given to him/her by God and that baby has dignity given to him/her by God and who are we to say that this person no longer has any God given dignity? How are we to pass judgement of that caliber on another person? We cannot.

And if we stand up and profess that God can forgive and believe that God can forgive even the most heinous of crimes, how can we believe we ever truly lose that God given dignity. And if we believe that we cannot truly lose that God given dignity, than how on Earth can we rejoice that another human beign has been killed? Can we feel relieve, can we feel a little safer and can we decide to not mourn? Yes. But does that mean we must rejoice? No. It's tactless. It's undignified. It's un-American.

I am pro-life. I do not rejoice in bin Laden's death. I pray for his soul and for God's mercy upon him. I pray that all of you find the time to offer prayers for him as well.

"Answer them: As I live, says the Lord God, I swear I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked man, but rather in the wicked man's conversion, that he may live." - Ezekiel 33:11

Belief

This title has much more to do than just the concept of belief. It actually deals with thoughts I had while recently listening to the John Mayer song.

Now according to dicionary.com belief is a noun meaning "confidence in the truth or existence of something not immediately susceptible to rigorous proof" or "confidence, faith, trust." And according to John Mayer, "belief is a beautiful armor, that makes for the heaviest sword." And he can't "recall, ever breaking rank at all for something someone yelled real loud one time." Finally, John asserts that "We're never gonna win the world, we're never gonna stop the war, we're never gonna beat this if belief is what we're fighting for."

I like John Mayer music. I do. It's got great guitar, and he has a really good voice. But sometimes John Mayer, the things you sing disturb me. Now, I'm not saying I disagree with what he's saying on belief. If belief is all we have, if "confidence in the truth or existence of something not immediately susceptible to rigorous proof" is the only thing we're using to try and change the world, we're in trouble. Because it does look good. It is a "beautiful armor." It is the idea that there are better times ahead. And life is good. But when trying to set the world ablaze, it "makes for the heaviest sword." We live in a world that demands proof for everything. And belief, as defined by the dictionary, doesn't offer that. But belief should not stand on it's own. Belief is interrelated, very closely, with faith.

Again, dictionary.com will define faith as "belief in god or in the doctrines or teachings of religion" (bold added for emphasis). Even in a dictionary the are interchangable and dependant on one another. But I never leave things to just how the culture points to them. In the very beginning of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) we read "Faith is man's response to God, who reveals himself and give himself to man, at the same time bringing man a superabundant light as he searches for the ultimate meaning of his life (26)."But what does this mean? Simple. Faith isn't just a belief. It's not just some "confidence in truth or existence of something not immediately susceptible to rigorous proof."

Faith is man's response to God. But why are we responding? Because God is trying to reveal himself and give himself to us. So when God is revealing, or telling us something about himself, and we are responding to it, then all of a sudden we realize exactly and truly what faith is. Faith is a relationship. Faith is knowing and loving and serving God because He has revealed His goodness and mercy and love to us, and we are moved to and required to respond to the revelation.

So all of a sudden if we look at belief in reflection of what we know faith to be, everything changes. All of a sudden belief becomes confidence in truth or existence to something, which in this case, and, in my opinion what John Mayer is talking about, God, to be susceptible to rigorous proof! How better to know that something exists, that it is real and true than to know the thing. To be in relation with it. All of a sudden, my faith is pushing forward my belief in God because I know Him. I spend time with Him. I am in relation with Him.

And I think when we realize this, John Mayer's lyrics cannot hold true. Because belief that is encouraged by this faith, will cause people to "break rank for something someone yelled real loud sometime." Not because they're yelling it but because they're living it. And with this belief encouraged by this faith we can "win the world" "stop the war" and we can "beat this," and by this I mean hate and death and destruction. Belief is still a "beautiful armor" because our Lord is beautiful. But it no longer is "the heaviest sword" because a relationship is something we live and can prove and can share.

So my prayer is that all of you work to find a faith that does help you know the truth because you are in relation with the One who made you. God bless.