Forgiveness has been on my mind a lot lately. It could be the plethora of forgiveness themed songs I've been listening to courtesy of Relient K. Or it could be the fact that I've been pretty upset about things lately.
I'm 22 years old and I'd like to think pretty easy going about most things. Although everyone seems to think differently because I get told I need to relax, smile and have more fun... a lot. But irregardless, the forgiveness that I'm talking about it because I have had feelings of anger towards other individuals, and I have to keep telling myself to forgive them. When I look at their transgressions agaisnt me, I know I'm just being silly, it is not a big deal at all. So why? Why do I seem incapable of forgiving? More importantly, why do I let the little things get to me so much?
I came to a huge revelation. My anger is not at them. My anger is at me. It is not those who I perceive as wronging me who I am truly mad at. It's myself. And while I may be struggling to forgive those people who have done wrong to me. The one person I can never truly forgive, the one who I am hardest on is myself.
Who the hell am I? Seriously. Am I really that great that I have sinned so heavily that the price Christ paid on the Cross was not good enough for me? Am I so vain I think my sins are unforgivable. That I am the first one who has and the only one who ever will commit them.
I read an interesting piece once about the sign of peace. I'm not sure about other Chrisitan denominations or even other religions, but I know in the Catholic Church we offer the sign of peace to one another after reciting the Our Father at every Mass. And in the sign of peace something amazing happens. When we say, "Peace be with you," what we are saying is actually three things:
1) God, I forgive this person of all that they have done to cause me harm.
2) God, I want you to forgive this person and forget everything that they have done.
3) God, not only that, but I want you to give this person a life full of joy and blessings.
That's some powerful peace you're sending someone else's way. It when you think of the sign of peace is that, it really makes you think. To say that this person may have greviously transgressed agaisnt me, but God, I want you to forget everything about that and create plans for them to prosper. And God wants to do it. And He wants us to want to do that to others. We are called to live as He lives and He forgives. So should we.
But this isn't my problem. My problem is me. What I need is to offer myself a sign of peace. I need to say, "God, I forgive me for all that I've done to cause me harm. And I want you to forgive me and forget all that I've done. And I want you to give me a life full of joy and blessings." Because in all my sin. In all my wrong doing. I am still God's child. And I would not treat another child of God, another of my Brothers and Sisters and Christ as I treat myself.
The Golden Rule is to treat others as you yourself would want to be treated. But you must also treat yourself as you would treat others. We cannot degrade and hate ourselves because we are loved by He who is Love.
So remember, my dear friends, that you are special and beautiful and wonderful and created by a Father who loves you. And so am I. So to end this I'll leave you with some of those wonderful Relient K lyrics I was telling you about:
Don't give up it's not the end. There's hope for every fallen man.
Forgiveness can be given when you think it can
Because with every passing second comes a second chance.
God bless.
Monday, February 15, 2010
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